It was on 11th July 2021 that Miss Chisom, Ada Emily a recent graduate of the Department of Physiology, University of Nigeria, Enugu Campus was declared missing. The notice was contained in captioned photos that littered the Whatsapp statuses of most students in the college of medicine at the University of Nigeria, Enugu Campus.
Emotions were high, prayers were offered, and positive energy exuded on all sides, strongly expecting her safe return. Information continued to spill, describing how she returned from church that day and while still on heels picked up two laptops from a room she shared with other girls and set off. Dialling their beloved child’s number, we were informed that her parents were received on the other end of the line by a male voice. Details of the conversation (if any held) were not made public.
Enugu State had within a week, seen the gruesome killing of two people, Mr Okeke, CEO of Auto Ease –an automobile body works outfit on Sunday, 4th July 2021 and the Director-General of the Science and Equipment Development Institute (SEDI) Prof. Samuel Ndubisi, assassinated alongside his security detail on Tuesday, 8th July 2021. Now one can understand why there was a lot of fear and deep concern attached to Miss Emily’s missing.
Fast forward to the following day, she hadn’t still returned and the tension in the air became palpable. Relevant authorities were informed, and the search continued. It wasn’t until 1 pm that news went round that she had been found by Dr Chinemerem Choice Nworgu, a lecturer with the same department as Miss Emily. He was on his way to a scientific conference at Nsukka, Enugu State but happened to be at the Emene area at the time, riding with his cousin. He recognized her from the widely circulated photos, especially the one with the dress she was last seen in.
Other details are contained in this voice note Dr Nworgu sent out, explaining the situation. My focus with this article isn’t to dissect the details of her ‘rescue’ but to address a toxic pattern of comments that trail this case.
I met the news of Emily’s missing with great concern and fear because lately, Enugu famed for being peaceful was crumbling before our eyes. Some voices in my head urged me not to take this seriously. “She probably went to see a friend, and forgot to inform her roommates that she wouldn’t return that day”; “this could be a prank,” another said and at that point but I doused these voices by merely picturing the faces of my beautiful nieces and imagining the heart-wrenching pain I would experience if they were in this situation. I told myself that it didn’t matter what led her out, what mattered was that she returned to those she loved, alive and well.
When we all learnt she was found, my heart became full of gratitude but quickly turned heavy while reading comments that look like this “Na man house she go abi? (Vernacular English for ‘she went to a man’s house right?’). I found out soon enough, that a handful of people on a Whatsapp group chat I belong to did their best to dismiss this case as one unworthy of the attention it garnered. Some posited that Dr Nworgu was actively involved in her missing and that some things weren’t adding up, some also insisted that she deserved the dangers that came with that decision of allegedly visiting a male friend.
Rather than responding individually to these people who have allowed themselves to become consumed by unrefined thoughts, I chose to pour out my heart in this article.
To these individuals I ask, have you become so desensitized by life that you spew such comments with reckless abandon? What if Emily was murdered in such a gruesome way with photos of her body parts circulating the internet? You would then take to social media with meaningless captions and content void of compassion.
It’s incredible, the vitriol that trailed the news of Emily being found. To those people who chose to conclude she went to a man’s house, I dare ask, ‘what if she did?’ as a rule of thumb, dissociate yourself from the private life of an adult whose mental abilities are intact, being completely aware of the consequences of their actions whether leaning towards the positive or otherwise. Do we then fold our arms and abandon Emily if it can be confirmed that indeed, she went to visit a male friend? By all means NO! It is our responsibility as humans to rescue her from the consequences of that poor choice of trusting another human completely to that level of becoming vulnerable. It’s exhausting the standards set for women in this dammed society. Emily will be haunted with demeaning looks from self-righteous males and females who seem to be the epitome of all that is right and honourable but are whitewashed graves.
People make poor choices all the time. The esteemed major occupant of the Aso Rock Villa is a brilliant example of a poor choice that was unnecessary because the first term in office characterized by brazen disrespect for the rule of law, trifling treatment of the human life, a sluggish economy and a host of other actions that spell gross incompetence shouldn’t be given another opportunity. Now, the nations inflation rate continues to be worrisome. Ethnic slurs are spewed by the sitting head, code of conduct tribunal Justice Danladi Umar. His Excellency, the sitting President also casually threatens my people with military might all because we chose to remember solemnly, the intentional ethnic cleansing targeted at the people of Biafra during the civil war which lasted from 1967–1970.
Aren’t the majority of us today joining forces like never before to make sure a repeat of that mistake doesn’t see the light of day by ensuring we kick out the damn vultures in power by 2023? My niece could one day, make a poor choice out of insufficient information and scanty consultation but hey, I dare not abandon her because I love her dearly and nothing would make me stop. Especially because of the labour of love her parents sowed into my life.
I urge you today, who think that because Emily supposedly visited man to reclaim your humanity, compassion and soul that has been torn to shreds by the ravenous beast called life.
